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Супружество как точная наука. Ч. 4

O.Henry

THE EXACT SCIENCE OF MATRIMONY

PART 4

So I conveyed Mrs. Trotter to Cairo and established her in a family hotel far enough away from mine and Andy’s quarters to be unsuspicious and available, and I told Andy.

‘Great,’ says Andy. ‘And now that your conscience is appeased as to the tangibility and proximity of the bait, and leaving mutton aside, suppose we revenoo a noo fish.’ (предлагаю начать рыбную ловлю).

So, we began to insert our advertisement in newspapers covering the country far and wide. One ad was all we used. We couldn't have used more without hiring so many clerks and marcelled paraphernalia (секретарш с завивкой) that the sound of the gum chewing would have disturbed the Postmaster-General.

‘We placed $2,000 in a bank to Mrs. Trotter's credit and gave her the book to show in case anybody might question the honesty and good faith of the agency. I knew Mrs. Trotter was square and reliable and it was safe to leave it in her name.

With that one ad Andy and me put in twelve hours a day answering letters.

About one hundred a day was what came in. I never knew there were so many large hearted but indigent men in the country who were willing to acquire a charming widow and assume the burden of investing her money.

Most of them admitted that they ran principally to whiskers and lost jobs and were misunderstood by the world, but all of them were sure that they were so chock full of affection and manly qualities that the widow would be making the bargain of her life to get them.